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Perfectly Imbalanced
I sat watching a man spin and balance
several plates and saucers on wooden poles all while he stood on one
foot and sang, America the Beautiful.
These plates seem to spin forever with only a
slight jiggle of the poles on occasion to keep them flying. Wow! I was entranced. I wish I could achieve such balance.
Family, career, health, friendships,
and personal growth are just some of the plates I am trying to keep
spinning today. Everyone you talk to today
is seeking balance.
Several of the companies I work with use the term, “work-life balance.” This somehow implies that work is perhaps death since we are balancing it with life?
For years I struggled with the concept
of balance as I juggled too many things: four children, a marriage, a
business to run, flabby body to work on, and so on the list went.
I envied people
skipping off to work with pressed suits and a healthy sack lunch
packed, when the only ironing I did involved running a curling iron
over my clothes as I was wearing them and packing a lunch meant
throwing a baggie full of fruit loops into my purse on the way out the
door.
At the end of their very productive day
these “balanced” individuals would drive their children to piano
lessons, soccer practice, and fourth-year French, and arrive home
together to enjoy a sumptuous meal that had been simmering in the
crock-pot. They would spend time reading together
as a family and then one by one, each child would drift off to
la-la-land as a lull-a-bye was sung at their bedside.
Okay you and I both know those people don’t exist or they are all locked up in asylums somewhere after they snapped! But it seemed as if other people had it all together.
Not long ago I purchased one of the new fangled Pilate's balance balls. (This was another one of my attempts to exercise while “multitasking.” You know, exercise while eating, folding laundry or cooking dinner.) My goal was to try and balance on this giant gray ball, either sitting, or kneeling. It is very tiring trying to stay balanced.
That is when it hit me. Attempting
to find perfect balance is tiring, and maybe we shouldn't be looking
for perfect balance at one particular point in our life, but we should
shoot for balance over a long period of time.
Take a look at a year. Perfectly
balanced with twelve months or four seasons and yet each month does not
include a little of winter, spring, summer and fall. Oh sure there are
times when you get a day of sunshine followed by snowflakes the next
(at least in Colorado), but that is not the norm.
Our life is the same. We
go through seasons, and within these seasons we do not typically have a
little of everything in it perfectly balanced…at least it is not the
norm. We have a career season, a family season, a friendship season, and so on.
A couple of years ago, my health
“plate” was pulling my attention as I hit that big 4-0, I realized I
needed more focus on this plate. I entered one of
the Ultimate Body Challenges and took second place, winning cash and
motivation to keep focusing on this plate. I began Taekwondo lessons
and soon found that I was living at the gym (or Do Jang as it is
called). Although my daughter and I took lessons
together, we rarely ate dinner at home as a family and the other
members of our troop began tipping that family plate.
There was another season when I was
able to really focus on my spiritual growth plate, attending weekly
study groups and even teaching an adult Sunday morning class for
newlyweds, with my husband. My spiritual plate and my family plate were humming along, but my business plate was barely hanging on.
This season my career plate is spinning
fast and furious, requiring very little effort to keep it flying high,
but the other plates—family, health, friendships, spiritual
growth—well, you know where those are headed.
I have come to the conclusion, at least in my circus tent, that it is impossible to have all the plates, spinning effortlessly, all the time. You
will have seasons when you must “jiggle” or put more focus and effort
on one plate as the others are spinning along, and as soon as you get
that plate stabilized, another one starts to wobble.
Today I had to laugh, because a woman
came up and told me how much she admired the way I keep my family and
career so well balanced, I smiled and said, “thank you,” realizing she
just couldn’t see all the broken china on my floor.
WISE CRACKS!
Taylor: Knock knock.
Bailey: Who's there?
Taylor: Control freak. Now you say, "Control freak who?"
Bailey: Huh?
World's oldest man attributes his 145 years of healthy living to a typographical error!
Did you know:
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Hawaii is home to the
tallest mountain on the planet? Mauna Kea, on the big island, measured
from sea floor to summit is 33,476 feet! (From sea level to summit is
13,796 feet)
-
In 1985 there were 300K
cell phone subscribers carrying around their brick-sized phones. In
2002 the numbers rose to 86.1 million subscribers and fortunately the
size of the phones shrunk to Barbie-sized gadgets.
-
There are approximately 86 million people driving on the freeways while talking on their Barbie-sized cell phones right now!
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Michaelangelo hated to
paint. He thought it was for sissies. Sculpting was his love and yet he
is most famous for painting the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel.
COMING IN NOVEMBER!!
Special book coming out mid-November--just in time for Christmas!
Finally, a collection of stories by Gina Schreck, to inspire and make you laugh.
Tony-the-Toenail, Hot-Air Balloons and other stories to lift your spirits!
Look for details in next months newsletter or watch Amazon.com
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ASK
BOB
A Regular Column on Relationships by Man's Best Friend
Q: I don't know if you are
a parent or not, but my dilemma involves my 11-year-old
daughter. My husband and I have always been very
protective of her, and we are very careful of what we allow into
our home through the television, but we don't how to handle this
area when it comes to the TV at her friends' house.
When she goes over to some of her friends' homes, their parents
allow them to watch MTV, HBO, and some other programs that we find
inappropriate for 11-year-old children to watch. (Most of it
is inappropriate for adults, but that is a different soap
box.)
Do you have any suggestions for us aside from banning her from going over there all together?
A: I have never had my
own litter of pups, but I have been in a house with pre-teens and teens
for eight years now, so of course I have some thoughts for you.
Personally, I think all kids, regardless of their ages, should only be
allowed to watch the Animal Planet, but that could be a bit
extreme.
Your pups are your responsibility until they are 126 (or 18 in
people years), so you cannot let up on your duties just because they
are at another home. This probably takes a three legged
approach.
#1 You need to discuss with your daughter why you have the
viewing guidelines for your family and outline what they
include.
#2 You need to get to know the other friend's parents and don't
be afraid to call them and discuss your
viewing guidelines. Use statements like, "I know we may
be a little over protective, but..." If you still don't feel
comfortable, have her invite her friends over to your home or find
other friends that share your same values.
#3 Teach your daughter what to say and do when she finds
herself in these situations. This will go beyond television
programming choices. This practice will come in handy when faced
with other tough teen choices later on.
Bob "Barker" is the faithful companion to
the Schreck family and resides in Littleton, Colorado. Like most
dogs, Bob is a relationship expert and would love to answer your
questions. Just send mail to Bob@schrecktalk.com
P O W
(Pearls of Wisdom)
It is not enough to stare up the steps—we must step up the stairs!
“The mind is the pilot of the soul.” ~Socrates, as quoted in Plato’s Phaedrus
“What is a friend? A single soul dwelling in two bodies.” ~ Aristotle
Monthly Challenge!
Make a list of your "plates" and then determine
where you need to spend some time spinning. Is your family life
starting to topple? How about your spiritual health?
Party of One
“Schreck, party of one. Your table is ready.”
Is it really a party if you are eating alone? I don’t see why restaurants have to rub it in when you come in by yourself.
I think this humiliation tactic that
restaurants use is designed to discourage individuals from wasting good
table space that could bring in bigger tips. Even when I am sitting right in front of the hostess stand, they insist on announcing it over the intercom system.
Another tactic used to drive away
solo-diners is to put you at a tiny tray-sized table that barely
fits a plate and water glass, let a lone the bread basket and salt
shaker that will teeter on the edge of the table. Who else would they dare to seat there?
This “speck” of a table is usually
squeezed between the large “party” tables just to draw more of a
contrast and highlight the fact that you are indeed, all alone!
I will usually
ask to be moved to a booth or table out of the spot light, but the
person seating me usually says they are reserved for larger parties.
Maybe there ought to be large tables designed for several solo-diners to sit together.
If you notice, people dining alone are usually trying to look busy, talking on their cell phone or reading a book. Me, I sit and write about dining alone. These
activities tell those big table, party people that you may be lonely,
but gosh darn it, you at least have a life…it’s just not here or now.
“Last call for Schreck, party of one.” I guess I better go, my party is about to begin.
FEARS
There are 451 documented phobias, and here are a few. See if you can guess what the fear is. (Answers are at the bottom)
1. Arachibutyrophobia—This could be a sticky situation
2. Phonemophobia –This may explain those teenage years
3. Luposlipaphobia—This one may hound you on cleaning day
4. Sciophobia –This fear follows you wherever you go
5. Automatonophobia—This will fake you out
© 2004
Feel free to forward this to all of your friends, family members and even those you don’t particularly care for!
It may not be sung in a high school play,
written in sand on beaches west of Belize or photocopied without our permission though, so for reprint permission, please call 303-978-0887.
"Random Thoughts" is a monthly email distributed by The Pinnacle Group & SchreckTalk Keynotes. www.Schrecktalk.com
Answer to FEARS:
- The fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of your mouth.
- The fear of thinking.
- The fear of being chased around your kitchen
table by a pack of timber wolves while you are wearing socks on a
freshly waxed floor. (This sounds like a Far Side cartoon)
- The fear of shadows
- The fear of ventriloquist's dummies and wax statues.
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